ANCIENT& not so ancient WISDOM
offering a weekly positive perspective

June 23, 2005

"Do not use while bathing." 

- warning label on ConAir Hair Dryer

This week's AW (Ancient Wisdom) is not about the big ah-ha! It is about the big - huh?  I preface this by sharing with you my own annoyance at myself and the paradox of missing some hiring opportunities in presenting when I promote myself as an expert in communication. 

My annoyance is that I'm having to re-learn something I already know, which is 'you can't assume things without risking that something will go wrong down the line'. I say re-learn rather than remind myself, because knowing is one thing and doing is entirely different.

I had a good laugh at what I thought was a pretty dumb message by the local phone company. We use the phone company for our message center. They tag our voice mail with the line 'after you leave your message, please hang up the phone..."  On one hand, I think how 'thick' do they consider people to be? What else would you do with the phone besides hang it up? On the other hand, based on the number of calls they process a day, it's not worth the risk to leave that line off? Maybe, it's not so funny after all.

There is a warning on pepper spray 'Caution, may irritate eyes'. Well, of course it does! That's why it works. What kind of person would you need to warn about spraying it in their own eyes. Oh, that would be my son (who's supposedly related to me in some way). Reminds me of comedian Bill Engvall's routine 'Here's your sign!' The routine is about handing a sign to people that ask stupid questions. Here's one

A guy was in the mall parking lot with a coat hanger in the window of his car.

  Stupid question = “Did you lock your keys in the car?” 

”Nope, just washed it and I'm hangin' it out to dry.”

Here's your sign...

I'm a presenter and a trainer on communication and I eat, breath, and live in the world of communication. I have seen some funny things and as it turns out - done some myself. So for making assumptions when I shouldn't have... 'Here's your sign, Jeffrey!' 

I was interviewed for teaching closing on the phone to people that close on the phone. I was in the finalist group and lost the job to someone that was not selected as a finalist because they insisted on interviewing in person. I had assumed that it made more sense to hire someone that could demonstrate phone skills on the phone and did not feel it necessary to ask the potential client if they would be interviewing in person. 'Here's your sign, Jeffrey!'

In another example, a high-tech company narrowed the decision down to two people from over a dozen. They wanted something new and innovative for their sales force. They picked the other guy, because 'we hadn't seen stuff like yours before Jeffrey'. I thought their wide eyes when I met with them was excitement and not fear. I had assumed that 'innovative' meant they wouldn't have seen it before. 'Here's your sign, Jeffrey!'

And finally, I lost a presenting opportunity to an association that focuses on training and development. They wanted a presentation on spontaneity in learning. They hired a person that made the presentation on PowerPoint. I never asked what they thought 'spontaneity' would look like. I just assumed that a focus on interaction would convey 'spontaneity' and just shared with them my experiences. Well, 'Here's your sign, Jeffrey!'

And who's to blame? Well, no one but me, because after all I'm the communication expert. Oh well, 'Here's my sign!'

Wishing you great experiences with eyes wide open and fewer assumptions than yesterday.

Sincerely,