Conflict
Keepers
Steps
to handle conflict
By
Jeffrey Hansler, CSP
You
may have noticed that due to the current economic conditions
(or possibly the weather), a great many people are uptight.
You can see the increased aggression on the roads and in
public interactions among people.
While
you have every right to emotionally explode along with those
around you, you could optionally accept the responsibility
to become a calming influence. I believe that by doing
so you will help others through a difficult time, and you
will enhance yourself spiritually and financially.
When
faced with a person in the attack mode there are four steps
to aid in communication that you can utilize.
First,
compare their current actions with their normal behavior.
If its an acquaintance that is usually amiable, you might
allow them greater leeway. If it is a stranger,
proceed with caution.
Second,
decide whether you will leave or stay. Evaluate what
frame of mind you're in and if you are going to be engulfed
by your involvement. Sometimes a good verbal battle
between friends clears the air, as long as what's said,
doesn't damage the long term relationship.
Third,
if you are going to stay, state your position in relation to
theirs or just listen, whichever is more appropriate.
To state your position, you might say or even shout, "I
think your approach is unnecessary, but I'll listen to you
for a short time."
Fourth,
follow your listening activity with questions about what
they have said. Most conflicts are due to
misunderstandings. By asking questions, you increase
the chances of clearing up those misunderstandings.
Many
people are facing situations new to them, this brings
out the best and the worst in people. Although, not
every situation will end better than it started, by
following these steps you can be on the positive side of
many more situations.
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Jeffrey
Hansler is a professional speaker, author, and consultant.
He is a frequent speaker at association events and is the
author of Sell Little Red Hen! Sell! He can be reached at jhansler@oxfordco.com.
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©
2004 Jeffrey Hansler All rights reserved
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